Resisting, Phase 2

Hello dear revolutionary(s)!

You may or may not have heard about the piece of shit “Christian” from Montana who was just elected after committing assault on a journalist for daring to do his job.  You may or may not have heard that even before the assault, he said he wanted to get rid of Social Security because retirement was not biblical according to his fiction book said that Noah built an ark at the age of 600 and therefore it is okay to make laws based on that disproved line of bullshit.

Today, you may have heard about the governor of fucking Texas (Why don’t you just fucking secede already, since you think you’re better than everyone and you are your own fucking republic anyway?) made a “joke” (credible and dangerous threat) about shooting reporters.

The fascists are in power.

The House passage of the AHCA, the movement on Trump’s budget, Jeff Session’s for-profit drug war, and Trump cozying up with murderous dictators (even congratulating them on it) should show that fucking petitions, letters, and phone calls aren’t cutting it anymore.

The way we resist needs to change.

But what can we do short of armed insurrection?

Well, how about we as liberals and progressives quit living in a fantasy world that doesn’t exist?

The conservatives, the GOP, the NEW Soviet Union, and the inbred Trumpeters all would gladly watch our nation burn just to spite us, even if it means catching themselves on fire.  They control the government and use the insane laws we have been fighting to get changed in order to maintain it.  We have tried every single method to change those laws but to no avail.   Until we can change those laws, we need to take advantage.

We need to arm ourselves.   Train ourselves.   Form militias that can exist under the law the same ways their stupid fucking hate groups can.  Not to fight, but to prove we can.  It won’t take us long once we finally start taking advantage of how things are now before we are stronger than they are.  After all, we are not ignorant, inbred, hateful people who parade around in Cabella’s camo gear but couldn’t lift our AR-15’s to our shoulders because we are too exhausted from the all the moonpies, Whataburgers, and beer weighing our fat asses down.

We need to get on juries.  Quit trying to dodge them.  Get on those things, and if someone is up for a drug crime, we fucking acquit them.  If they seem as though they have an overworked public defender, we fucking acquit them.  If they are being accused of anything that you know you have done, or another person you know has done, we acquit them.  If them being incarcerated serves the private, for-profit prisons of Jeffyboy and his buddies, we acquit them.

We take advantage of the ridiculous “stand your ground” laws that we so despise.   We can change them when we win.  In the meantime, they are taking advantage of them against us.  George fucking cunt-ass Zimmerman is a hero to some of these Thugpublicans.  You’re a reporter from the Guardian and some Montana dickhead decides to assault you?  Well, maybe he had an iced tea and skittles on him.  How are you supposed to know?  I call shooting him self-defence.  He came at you.

They pushed these laws on us to bring “frontier justice” to our doors.  We can’t bury our heads in the sand and pretend they are not fighting against us anymore.  They want the Wild West, they can live the consequences too.  These laws are being used to kill the poor.  The minorities.   The free press.  The liberals and progressives.

Only because we want peace.

But when someone is literally trying to kill you, closing your eyes and choosing not to participate just gets you killed.

It’s not time to revolt.  Yet.

We don’t commit the crimes.

We don’t need to.

We don’t want to give the fascists an excuse to “crack down” and send out the badge-holding goons to quell anything.

But we need to quit pretending we can ignore the armies being formed against us.  The government endorsed acts of terror.  The stealing away of our fundamental rights.

There is a war being fought against us.   The fastest way to lose a war is to surrender.

Good day and good luck.




Vicious Cycle

Hello dear revolutionary(s)!

Yesterday, at least 13 Jewish Community Centers were evacuated due to bomb threats.  Today, it appears as though some have already been evacuated this morning for the same, heinous reason.

My Facebook feed was lit up last night with debates over whether the new Republican administration had emboldened anti-Semitic assholes in this nation, or whether or not it has much less to do with the administration than people think, as anti-Semitic bullshit has been on the rise in this nation for years.

I did my best to stay out of the debate, because I wanted to hold onto the good mood I was in yesterday, the potential emotion involved of some of the participants who may have a personal stake, and because I was freaking exhausted.

But I saw this debate, with both sides agreeing how terrible it is, regardless of how it happened, and I realized how awful we can be at really understanding the simple nuance of things.  We want everything to be simple.  To be black and white.  And in that desire to keep things simple, we over-complicate things.  Because the simple answer to this debate, is that both sides are absolutely right.

The fact is, this administration would not exist, were hate against other ethnicities, other religions, other sexual orientations, other sexes, or other any other category that people choose to group other people into – not on the rise in recent years.

The fact is also, that public and criminal incidents of this type of emboldened, hateful bullshit have increased since the campaign, election, and inauguration of this Republican-Nazi administration.

It is a vicious cycle.  Nazis are given deference by a ratings-hungry, agenda-driven, corporate media as if their opinions are actually valid and not to be laughed off camera or given no airtime at all.  Those Nazis then elect a head Nazi to power.  The rest of the Nazis, still fearful of potential public backlash, see head Nazi in power and suddenly realize it is safe for them and their backwards, reprehensible, idiotic, hateful, disproved ideas and behavior to come out of the woodwork.

I support a free press, but television news and cable news networks are not a free press.  They are a ratings-reliant, propaganda system that creates news out of inflammatory nonsense in order to make money.  They do not report the news, and do not care about the truth.

A debate currently taking place is whether or not it is okay to punch self-admitted Nazis while they are being interviewed.  I strongly believe the answer is yes, but that isn’t the debate we should be having.  The debate we should be having is whether or not it is okay to punch the people who decided to give this asshole an interview in the first place.  Not all opinions are valid.  It is not the responsibility of the press to ensure that Nazis get interviews, and Nazi rallies disguised as political campaign stops are carried in full.  It is the responsibility to bring the people the truth about what is happening in the world, particularly when that truth is being so blatantly obstructed.  Being objective does not mean validating bullshit.

I’m not going to entirely blame the press, though.  The fact of the matter is that too many Americans are hateful, racist, anti-Semitic, Christian-fundamentalist, pieces of shit.

But there was a time once, even in my life, where if you wanted to fly a Nazi flag, it was going to be with a bunch of your fellow inbred fucking idiots behind your single-wide in your fucking trailer park.  And you sure as hell weren’t going to be interviewed as if what you had to say was any more valid than the rantings of the most unstable psychiatric patient who had been off their medication too long.

Cable and television news are not your friend.  They are not a friend to democracy.  Find news that investigates.  Support them.  Headlines are usually just tools of distraction.  Read the stories. Think.  Stop the cycle.

Hello dear reader(s)!

I want to talk about love today.  I think love is more important than ever.  I think you should be open to it.  Realize that means putting yourself out there, and making yourself vulnerable.  Realize that it means you are going to get hurt a few times before you find someone who doesn’t want to hurt you.  (At least, not in the ways you don’t like.)  Realize that it means that there are going to be a few people who will know your secrets, and know the deepest parts of you that you don’t believe deserve to know.  That’s okay.  Because when you find someone to love, who loves you, it will all be worth it.  Love yourself enough to know that you can withstand the heartache needed in order to find it.

Now, more than ever, love matters.  As hate fills everything around you, take comfort in your love.  Radiate that love, and maybe people will see there is a better way.

Good luck today, everyone (except fascists).

Fuck It

Hello dear reader(s)!

I’m done.  Done feeling sorry for myself.  Done feeling like I am doing something wrong.  I am who I am, and I like who I am.  Sure, I have my issues.  Who doesn’t?  But there are a lot of good things about me too.  I am generous, despite having next to nothing.  I am passionate.  I am honest with my feelings and do not play games with anyone’s emotions.  I allow myself to be vulnerable.  I don’t hold back.  I can be intense.

And not everyone likes those things about me.  But the right people will.

Yes, I can’t work.  Yes, I am not the richest, or best looking person on the planet.  I’m not 6 foot something with six-pack abs and model looks.  Yes, occasionally I get sick and can’t really do a whole lot.  I understand these things.

But I am a damn good person and I treat people right.

And if anyone doesn’t like that, fuck it.  Because I never want to change the core of who I am.

I care about other people.  It’s feels like a crime in this fucking world anymore.  Fine then, guilty as charged.  I love in the face of overwhelming hostility.  It really leaves me feeling like the odd man out.  Good.  I don’t want to fit in with these hateful fucks anyway.

I’m no longer feeling depressed, I’m feeling pissed off!

When most of the rest of the world gets mad, they respond with violence, or hate.  Not me.  I am just going to love that much harder.  I am just going to smile that much more to people who might need it.  And when someone treats me coldly, I will continue to respond with whatever warmth I can find in my heart.

For the last few days, I felt like giving up.  They were wearing me down.  But I can’t let them win.  I’m better than that.  I’m better than them.  I was feeling as though I really had nothing to live for.  But I have myself.  I have my belief that love can win out.  It is worth fighting for.

So bring it on.  Come at me, and try to destroy me.  Maybe you will succeed, though it is doubtful given what I have already survived.  But even if you do, what are you left with?  A cold world, full of hateful people, just trying to fill in the emptiness with possession after possession?  Fine, take it.  Have fun with that.  Either way, I win.

I may crack, but I can’t be broken.  I’ve been through so much, I sure as hell am not going to give up now.  So throw your hate my way.  Glare at me.  Roll your eyes at every attempt I make to reach out to you.  Laugh at me for believing that love matters.  Whisper things about me you don’t have the spine to say to my face.  It just proves my point, and reveals who you are.  Despite that, I’m still going to show you love.  Fuck it.  I win.

Stuck Between Love And Hate

Luna has left me.  Not for some major thing I have done, but I guess I am just unworthy of her love.  I feel like I am unworthy of any love since Hannah died.  She was the only person who I think ever really got me, and she’s gone.  I am at the point where I just don’t even know why I try.  I did not fight cancer so hard to be lonely and half functional.  I am not planning on killing myself, but I really wonder whether or not I still have it in me to fight if something should happen.

I do my best to stay positive, but I look around and I fucking hate this world and what feels like the vast majority of people in it.  Love means fuck all in this world.

Maybe it’s me.  Maybe I am the asshole, for daring to want to connect with someone.  Maybe I am too annoying, or just not attractive.  Maybe I’m a delusional idiot for thinking that I could be happy.  I must be.

My life is shit.  I hate it.  It really always has been, except for a few great moments here and there.

What I really don’t get is how someone can talk about fate and souls in the context of love and then just be like, “Nope.  Never mind.”

I want to hate her, but I can’t.  I hate what she did.  I hate how she claims to love me but is unwilling to give that love a chance.  I hate the, “It’s not you, it’s me” bullshit cop out that she basically said.  But I can’t hate her, because for some fucked-up reason, I really do love her.

I also can’t hate her, because I know it is me.  There is obviously something about me that she can’t stand.  The reality of me obviously didn’t live up to the fantasy of me in her mind.  I thought I was the same person I was at distance, but apparently not.

I’m not trying to make this a pity party post.  I’m very sad and I kind of hate myself right now, but I am not looking for sympathy.  I’m just trying to figure out what is so wrong with me.  Am I ugly?  Am I stupid?  Do I stink?  Is it because I am disabled?

I don’t know.

I know that my heart is broken.  Again.

I know that I am wondering what I am doing in this world.  I know that I feel completely useless and that if I were gone tomorrow it really wouldn’t matter to anyone.

No, I’m not suicidal.  I’m too chicken for that.

A friend last night told me that she wasn’t the right one for me.  That should be comforting, but it seems that anyone I think is right either is not interested or is dead.

I don’t mind being alone, but I don’t want to be alone forever.  I feel like that is inevitable at this point.  I’m not in school, or at a job where I can meet and connect with someone.  Nope, I’m thousands of miles away from anything I really know with no idea how to even meet someone or what to do next.

Any suggestions?  Other than to stop whining, of course.



The Undefeated

Dear hateful ones,

You can’t stamp out love.  No matter how hard you try, it is just not possible.  It has been tried by madmen and terrible people for as long as humanity has existed, and yet is never successful.  We are never defeated.

You can drive us underground, you can kill us, you can torture us, you can burn us at the stake, but you simply can not win.  We are the undefeated.

No matter how many people you may get to bask in your negativity, you will never take us all.  No matter how many people you cause to just give up, there will always be more fighting against you.  No matter how dark you try to make our world, we will still shine a light into it for those willing to see.

We are one with the Earth and the cosmos.  We are bigger than you, we preceded you, and we will be around long after you have gone.  You simply do not stand a chance against our power.

We are the peaceful, yet we are more effective than any weapon of war you could possibly imagine.  We do not want this fight, yet you foolishly bring it to us.

The most effective warriors are the ones who can win without fighting.  It is what we do, it is what we have done, and it is what we will continue to do.

The only thing you are accomplishing is leaving a more fucked up world for your kids.

I’m done talking to you.  It is obvious you don’t know history, do not understand that hate has never won, and aren’t going to understand anything I say.


Dear undefeated,

Seems like the world is a pretty awful place today, doesn’t it?  The hateful ones are in control of the traditional narrative.  Even in the non-traditional narrative, you have the paranoid conspiracy theorists telling you how everyone is evil and out to get you.  And look, there are people without the best intentions, and some hold power, that is obviously true.

But for every single one of them, there are thousands of us.


Just take a walk in your city or town.  Find other people of all walks of life not killing each other.  Some might even smile, or say hello.  For every piece of crap white supremacist you see, there are thousands of white people who happily interact with people of color on a daily basis.  For every white person who doesn’t understand the systemaitc oppression that has been going on, there are more of us who do and work to in an attempt to change it.  For every homophobic waste of flesh out there, there are many allies.  Do not let polls fool you, they are taken by people looking to create a narrative, not those looking to reflect what is actually going on.

Likely voters don’t include the millions upon millions who have been disenfranchised.  They don’t include the ones who have given up on politics and feel like they have no voice.  In fact, they mostly include people who answer their landlines and choose to participate in a poll.  That right there says something about the sample they take.

And yet still love is winning in those polls.  Not by the huge margins it does in real life, but it does.

Most people don’t want war.  They don’t want racism.  They don’t want bigotry.  They don’t want hate.  They don’t want to destroy the planet even as scared as they are about putting food on the table with any economic changes.  They want love.

The hateful people dominate the comments sections.  So much so that we leave knowing our opinions are futile.  It is a wide-spread joke.  Which means they only are such a major voice, because we leave.  They are not representative of us.  Let them have their echo chamber.  But don’t think they are winning.

Don’t think we can’t turn this around.  Don’t give up, rise up.  The system is messed up?  Cool, let’s change it.  Let’s do so without making things a lot harder for us first, but let’s change it.  These people are nothing.  No amount of hate they throw will ever beat us.  Let’s quit being afraid, quit believing the things they do to keep us from realizing who we really need to fight against, and let’s rise up to beat them.  We can come together on the basic issues of love, and trust, and equality.

Then we can debate the specifics in order to figure out a path forward together.

We need to rise against the horrors we are deliberately fed.  We need to stop consuming the hate and greed they shovel down our throats in order to keep us down.  We need to rise up and show these motherfuckers what happens when they take on the billions of loving and caring people who have always been, and will always be.

Who’s with me?

Let’s take back the narrative.  Let’s flood this planet with so much love that the media cannot drown it out with images of hate and violence.  Let’s be the love that the world needs right now.  Let’s show these hateful assholes who they are dealing with.  Let’s be love.


If You Try Sometimes

Hello Bernie or Buster(s)!

Did you really think primaries were democratic?

Of course the system is rigged.  Didn’t you already know that?  Bernie Sanders did.  He’d been talking about it for months.  So where were your protests while the voting was still going on?  Because guess what?

It’s too late now.  You have two choices.  Only two.  Jill Stein will not win.  Look at the polls.  Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton are the choices.  Bernie Sanders conceded.  He did.  Look it up.  There is nothing to be done now, except make you look all delusional.

I wanted the Democrats to choose Bernie Sanders.  I talked and talked about how much better I thought Bernie Sanders would be as President, and about how much more I like his consistent positions on the issues and his idealism.  I really, really wanted them to choose him.  I tried to get people to.  I talked about how the party was using the media, and the debate schedules to tip the scales for Clinton.

And yet, they were still able to tip the scales.  We didn’t need these fucking emails to tell us that the party elite wanted Clinton.  We needed the people to hear that and reject it.


This email leak is not news.  Parties select their nominees.  In a way, they have a right to.  It is their money, and their reputation on the line.  They work for the nominee, using the machinery they built.  We’re lucky we even get primaries.  The party sets rules for primaries, not the government.  The party wanted a tightly controlled poll.  A beauty contest.

Would Sanders have won in a regular election, without party interference, with open primaries?


But that’s not what this was.  And here is the part you may be missing…


His hope, was that his message would resonate in such a way, that the people would reject the party preemptively choosing Clinton and give her such a defeat in the polls, that the party couldn’t ignore it.  His other hope, was that failing that, he would show the progressive wing of the party is a genuine force within the party, and must be considered.  He succeeded in the second goal unlike anyone ever has.

Throwing a fit at the convention after he already conceded does nobody any good.  Refusing to vote for Clinton does nobody any good.

The party’s primary didn’t take your democracy, party politics are not democratic, and never have been.  Ever.  And it is their party.  They don’t have to be.

So you can be butthurt about that all you want, but here is what happens if you do not vote for Clinton.

  • Trump is elected.  Jill Stein isn’t even on the ballot in all 50 states.  She has no organization and is not capable of getting the votes to change a thing.  85% of Sanders supporters intend to vote for Clinton.  Which leaves just 15% who will go to Stein or the libertarian.  Not 15% of voters.  15% of Sanders supporters.  Of which only 40% of the Democratic primary voters are.  Which is roughly 50% of the primary voters in all parties.  Meaning, in the general, you will have up to 15% of 40% of 50% for Stein.  You are throwing your vote away, or just using it for some notion of vengeance against Clinton.  But what will that vengeance get you?
  • You betray your LGBTQ friends.  Trump will appoint justices who will try to overturn the ruling on marriage equality, and allow discrimination using religion as an excuse.  Only Christianity, of course.
  • You make Mike Pence Vice President.  A champion of straight white male privilege.  Congratulations.
  • You betray the women you know.  Because when a party and their nominees specifically state they want to control women’s bodies, and you allow those people to run your government, you are responsible.
  • You kick millions of people off of healthcare.  The ADA is far from perfect.  But it is light-years better than what we had before.  We can tweak it some, but scrapping it altogether is the stated goal of the Republicans.
  • You create more terrorism.  We’re talking about a President who advocates torture.  This isn’t a fucking episode of 24, and Trump is not Jack Bauer.  It just is not effective and makes us even more hated.  I don’t even like Hillary Clinton’s interventionism, but if you think the Republicans wont be a lot more trigger happy, you obviously don’t pay attention.
  • You create more income inequality.  Trickle down doesn’t work.  There is a reason Bernie Sanders was so quick to capitulate and try to work with the Democrats.  They don’t have anything on him.  He’s clean.  He’s just terrified of a Trump presidency, as well he should be.  Do you think he doesn’t how disastrous it would be to elect Trump?
  • Etc…  Just look at the platform.  It is the opposite of the Democratic platform.  Will Clinton enact every piece of the platform?  No, obviously.  But with Clinton, we get incremental steps forward instead of a radical regression backward along with the loss of the progress for DECADES thanks to the Supreme Court.

Do you want to sacrifice MILLIONS of people because the party didn’t play fair?  Because you didn’t get everything you want?

Is that where you’re at, you spoiled, rotten children?

Debbie wouldn’t let me have the Ferrari and stuck with me a TESLA!  Whaaaaaah!   If I can’t have my Ferrari I hate this TESLA!!!!   I’ll just lie here and die instead.”

That is what you are doing.

This election is too important to hand it over to a madman because someone hurt your little feelings.  People’s lives are on the line, this isn’t a fucking episode of My Super Sweet 16.  

Progressives are gaining a foothold in government again.  There are many progressive candidates running for other offices in November.  If you hand the Presidency to Trump, they will have no ability to push their agenda whatsoever.

So take off your trilby that you mistakenly call a fedora, put down your signs, and work to ensure that Trump does not end the revolution Sanders helped create.

When Trump comes for the Immigrants, it will be on you.  When Pence allows homosexuals to be slaughtered, it will be on you.  When an ineffective and symbolically wrong wall is built and Mexico won’t pay for it, taking money away from things that actually matter as people starve and die of exposure, it will be on you.  When violence between races in encouraged by our government, it will be on you.  When violence is acceptable as the way to deal with political opposition, it will be on you.  How well do you think you will do with your progressive values in a fascist regime?

But I guess you should have gotten your way, huh?


Hello dear reader(s)!

So I was going to save any kind of political posts or rants for the Coalition of the Brave site, but I have decided this particular post would be better off over here.  That site is about higher level discussion and I just don’t have that in me on this one.  This particular post is largely based on the fear and anger I feel at what is going on right now around the world and I don’t feel the kinds of parallels I am about to draw belong on anything that is a collaborative effort.  These are my insults and my feelings, and it would not be fair to have anyone else associated with what I am about to say.

When we learned about the holocaust in elementary school, I remember being deeply disturbed not so much by the fact that there were people who were so evil they would want to exterminate an entire people, but by the fact that almost an entire nation went along.  I wondered how anybody could possibly not recognize the horrible hatred being spouted by the Nazis before it was too late to stop their rise.  I wondered how most of a country could be complicit in the systematic deaths of ten million innocent people, including six million Jews.

And the footage from the Trump rallies began to answer my question.  But then I thought those were just isolated incidents, and surely it was just a fringe opinion.  And then the UK voted to leave the EU.

Now, I understand not everybody who voted to leave the EU voted that way because of nationalism, racism, and anti-immigration sentiment.  I understand that there are legitimate concerns associated with the organization of the EU, the trade regulations, and the entire system of globalization and the questions of sovereignty that globalization brings.  I get that.

But I also know that a large portion of how it was sold to the public was using that racism, xenophobia, and anti-immigration rhetoric.

When the Nazis were coming to power, not everybody who helped them obtain power did so because they hated Jews.  Many probably voted for the Nazis after the 1932 re-election of Hindenburg as a protest vote, or because the Hindenburg government was deemed as weak and ineffective.  Many probably had legitimate concerns about the way government in Germany was being run and thought that anything had to be better than what they had.  Many probably felt betrayed and disenfranchised by an elite ruling class and were attracted to the Nazi’s promise to make Germany great again.

Does this sound familiar?

I am sick to death of the political class in the world today.  I am sick and tired of the corporate oligarchy that clouds any notion of democracy.  I am fed up with career politicians who change with the breeze and may not be the best representatives of the people.  However…

I have a duty to vote against anyone who will attempt to make scapegoats of entire races or religions in order to gain power.  I have a duty to not allow anyone who is purposely riling up the racist sentiments of people to get votes.  I have a duty to not allow anyone to stoke the irrational fears of a populace to further their own agenda.  I have a duty to not allow anyone who openly calls for violence against those who hold different opinions to ever reach powerful office.

And sorry, but I have a duty to call out anyone who does.

If you intend to vote for Donald Trump, you are complicit in racism.  No matter why you don’t like Hillary Clinton, no matter what good reasons you have to not want to vote for a Democrat, no matter how badly you want the system to be reformed…you are complicit in open racism and the rise and emboldening of hate in our country.

If you stay home instead of voting for his opponent who will actually be on the ballot in all 50 states against him, you are standing watching as the throngs of racists he has inspired are fighting the groups of whatever people he has attempted to scapegoat for your problems.  And if you are standing and watching, you are complicit in whatever crimes are committed against those people as a result.

History has shown that it is not a place you want to be.  When you allow a distaste for the political establishment to be used to install a power-hungry dictator, very bad things happen.  It already is starting.  Do you really want that on your hands?

This is how it starts.

We all know how it ends.

If you support a candidate, or a policy that is sold on hate, you aren’t just an idiot, you are complicit.