Broken

Hello dear reader(s)!

This post is dedicated to all of those who are constantly bitching that they are broken and lonely.  The ones who repost the meme that it takes a strong man to love a broken woman.  No, it doesn’t.  It takes an idiot or an emotional masochist.  Or it takes a sociopath to pretend to love one.

At my age, I don’t know a single person who hasn’t had their heart broken.  I haven’t met one person who hasn’t gotten screwed over by someone who took advantage of them.  Not one.

How we survive is what makes us who we are.” – Rise Against

But I do know a lot of people who are not willing to let that stop from trusting their hearts with someone again.  I do know a lot of people who understand that not everything is going to work out and not everyone is meant for them.  I know people who are willing to take a chance to get what they want.

If everything always worked out perfectly than the people who were right for you that came into your life or appeared to you at the right time wouldn’t be very special.

If you are too broken to be able to open up and make yourself vulnerable to someone, you really have no business looking for love until you are fixed.

But you’re not even broken anyway, are you?

No.  You are scared.  Which makes you unable to trust.  Which makes you unable to love.

And the only people who are going to want to be with someone who can’t ever love or trust them are the sociopaths who don’t care how someone feels about them anyway.  By being “broken” you are making yourself a target for further damage.

We all have our down days.  Some of us have down periods.  But the most attractive people I know are the ones who shine through their darkness and light up the world.  The phoenix that rises from the ashes.  Not the ones who sit and whine about being broken and wondering why they can’t find someone special.

The greatest pain of my life so far was because someone couldn’t trust me enough to reveal her addiction and let me help her through it.  Her fear killed her.  Her lack of trust that those who loved her would continue loving her literally prevented anyone from being able to help her until it was too late.  The only solace in that I have is that she was able to know we all still loved her and always will before she died.

If you know me, you know I have seen some things.  You know I have been through some things.  You know that if someone is going to be “broken:” I probably have plenty of excuses.

But I choose not be.  I have scars, but I am far from broken.  I can trust.  I can love.  I can give love to those who love and trust me.  I will continue to go into everything with an open heart and the optimism that it might work and be the greatest thing since sliced pie.

There are only so many times someone can show they have opened their hearts to someone and be met with walls before they put up their own.  There are only so many times you can tell someone you are broken before you end up proving yourself right.

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Author: Josh Wrenn

Cancer survivor, wanna-be artist, musician, author, and all around good guy.

21 thoughts on “Broken”

  1. “Confronting our feelings and giving them appropriate expression always takes strength, not weakness. It takes strength to acknowledge our anger, and sometimes more strength yet to curb the aggressive urges anger may bring and to channel them into nonviolent outlets. It takes strength to face our sadness and to grieve and to let our grief and our anger flow in tears when they need to. It takes strength to talk about our feelings and to reach out for help and comfort when we need it.”
    Mr Fred Rogers.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Fred is right. It is that very unwillingness to do that, to confront the feelings and give them the appropriate expression that the people who hide behind the word “broken” seem to not realize is keeping them from meaningful connections.

      Like

    1. Exactly. “Some folks are so scared of the world around them they forget to live.” Those are the people I am referring to. They forget to live from their fear, and still wonder why they can’t find happiness. Or they advertise their negativity which only brings that negative. We all have bad days. None of us are truly broken.

      Like

  2. It’s okay to feel broken for a little while, not wallow. But then pull up yo damn big kid under Roos and live because you can! We are all broken somehow. Just like Dory ” just keep swimming!” Whatever broke you wasn’t meant for you anyway! Xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I was broken, probably still am, but I shine on. I suffered from fear of commitment and boy did I take the bull by the horns. I just had to want it enough. Fear is my worst enemy and trust is really hard, but I shine on.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Reblogged this on Mental Break – In Progress and commented:
    This is too true to not reblog. I have been this person in the past…and sometimes I slip even to this day and play martyr and I too know not one single person who doesn’t have the same story give or take a few details…

    Liked by 1 person

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