Moving Freestyle

Hello dear reader(s)!

Because my WordPress editor took forever to load today, I have decided to scrap my earlier post about the things that have been going on in my life recently and instead, have decided to freestyle a little poem for you right now.  This is in the moment, so if the rhyming scheme isn’t great, I do apologize.  It is a summary of how I feel about things in the last day or so, in rhyming form, no editing.  Hope it doesn’t suck.  Pretend it is a rap if that makes you feel better.

You think you know me based on memories twisted
Of some kid you imagined who never existed
Or maybe you base it off things that you know
As if all the things I’m willing to show
Perhaps it is based off events in my past
Something makes sense now at least and at last
I admit that those things did help to make me
And I fought damn hard so they wouldn’t take me
If you think knowing some things are enough to know me
You can fuck right off on your knees and blow me
I’m tired of living in your image of me
When there are sides you refuse to see
I’m tired of trying to explain my actions
Never enough for your satisfaction
I’m not some wounded story to tell
When you know things just haven’t gone well
It has become clear, there can be no doubt
I’m the number one topic you all talk about
I’m quite the buzz when I slip and react
To numerous times I have been attacked
I don’t need your pity and don’t need your words
Or condolences despite what you’ve heard
I’m just trying to live my life everyday
And fuck you asshole if you get in my way
I am a person who can deal with pain
I had to learn it so that I could stay sane
Those of you wishing it would define
Take a damn number, back of the line
Can’t walk around in this town without taking
Some shitty damn pity and whispered head shaking
Can’t have a night out with some of my friends
Without people wanting me to go backwards again
Can’t show my face without some dumb fool
Thinking he knows me from back in high school
‘Cause I’m the same person as back in some class
And if you believe that you can kiss my ass
I’ve done my best, I keep trying, I’ve grown
Been through much more than I’ve ever shown
Pre judging me based on rumors and lies
Or half-truths of which you can not know the size
Can’t have female friends without people suspecting
Don’t hurt your damn necks when you’re rubbernecking
I’m glad I’m the topic of your conversation
If life is that boring just take a vacation
Everyone here thinks that they see
Who I am but that is not me
The things in the past make me not define me
But that bugs you all so you try and remind me
As if I’d forget all the things that went wrong
And the people I loved who I wish were not gone
But this life goes on and for me I must live
And I have much more that I can still give
That is if you all are willing to let me
If not I ask that you all please forget me
I can’t stand it here, and I think I am done
Goodbye, Nevada, it hasn’t been fun

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Author: Josh Wrenn

Cancer survivor, wanna-be artist, musician, author, and all around good guy.

5 thoughts on “Moving Freestyle”

  1. Oh my goodness I was going to scream…okay maybe I did raise my voice a tad, as wordpress would not let me update today. I have been out of town for over a week so was excited to type out the billions of blog ideas I have been hoarding around with me on my iPad notes…Finally got it to work through the WP Admin.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah, I was losing my mind. I woke up late anyway, and I had this whole eloquent thought out post about all of these things going on, and then it wouldn’t work. So I just said, screw it, I’ll do something on the fly when it comes up.

      Liked by 1 person

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