Yes, that’s right my dear reader(s), if you happen to live in an area where this happens, then it is already time to start the saving of the daylight.
“Saving daylight?” you ask, “I didn’t even know it was endangered.”
Well, apparently, it must be. You see, here in the good ol’ US of A, our beloved (treasonous) Congress has decided that we must set out clocks forward one hour, in an attempt to save the dwindling daylight population currently facing extinction. Not all states are required to participate, but for those who do, the change occurs at 2 am tomorrow morning (a.k.a. the middle of the fucking night). One of the few things that Congress has actually passed through both of its corrupt houses in the last 10 years was a bill that actually moved Daylight Saving Time earlier than it had been in the past. The move to earlier in the Fall was because of a hard push from the candy lobby so that it would occur before Halloween and their sales would increase as a result. (I’m not joking there, they actually covered that when the bill was passed. You’d think I’m making that shit up, but no…that is America.)
So now we have an hour of sleep stolen away from us. Well, actually, it is borrowed from us and given back in the Fall. The biggest crime of this idea isn’t just the increased traffic accidents, the sleep deprivation, the decline in productivity due to all the people who failed to correct their clocks and missed an hour of work; no, the real crime is that there isn’t even any interest paid out on the hour they borrow! Everyone who says that out government is a bunch of crooks has a very good point here. I mean, let’s take a look at borrowing from the government. Even the banks who are the favorite sons of the government pay interest for borrowing. How about students? When students take out a loan (through the banks but under federal programs), they pay 10 times the rate that banks do in order to borrow. Yet somehow, the government is able to borrow an hour from us with no interest? I think it must be the Illuminati!
Let’s dig a little deeper. Where is the data that shows daylight is even endangered? We know that daylight’s habitat is not shrinking. Daylight is not suffering from the effects of climate change or deforestation. Daylight is not experiencing mass die-offs due to ocean acidification. In fact, according to National Geographic, the sun won’t even begin to die for another 2.8 billion years. And at that point, it will only grow brighter, killing all life on Earth until about 5 billion years from now when it will begin to diminish. How can we say that something that is expected to outlast all other life needs Saving? This is just a government time grab in order to line the pockets of the greedy corporate fat-cats that control it! Now, I don’t mean to sound like a tin-foil hat conspiracy theorist, but I’m absolutely sure Socialism is involved here somehow.
Some media outlets are even misreporting the name of this government mandated event in order to make it more palatable to the citizenry. They are calling it “Daylight Savings Time” as if to suggest the idea that we are putting daylight into some sort of interest generating account for the benefit of our retirement. But, as I explained earlier, there is no interest paid on this hour stolen from us. We do not get the daylight back and then some. When we reach old age, we will not be able to live more comfortably because of this program. Encouraging 401Ks as a false way to save for retirement (when in fact it is nothing but government encouraged gambling to benefit the rich) was bad enough, but this goes even beyond that.
One could argue that this is just a drop in the bucket compared to all the horrible things our government has done, but tell that to Johnny Perkins of Carson City, NV, who was fired from his job because his cell phone failed to update the time change correctly and his alarm went off an hour late. Tell that to Jane Wilson of Wenatchee, WA who cut her finger in a fender-bender caused by a tired driver during the week after the time change. Tell that to Tom Smith of Denver, CO, who wanted to play an early round of golf before work, but it was too dark.
Daylight Saving Time is a menace. Studies show that in addition to increased accidents and lost productivity, there is also a rise in heart attacks and other health issues in the weeks surrounding the time change. WA State Representative Elizabeth Scott has bravely stood up to the corporate interests that keep this public nuisance so entrenched in our way of life. She testified before a House committee regarding the dangers associated with the time changes. Unfortunately, her voice has been shouted down by recreational business interests who fear that they will lose revenue if it appears dark earlier when people get off of work. (This paragraph is true, you can’t make this up.)
But at what cost? How many people must suffer for the greed of the recreation industry?
I really do believe that the problems outweigh the benefits of Daylight Saving Time. Yes, I have made light of some of the issues for your amusement, but in all honesty, people have lost their lives over this stupid time change. Some of these accidents have resulted in more than just a cut finger of a fictional person. There have been industrial accidents that likely resulted from this change. Heart attacks are also no laughing matter, (unless it is an attack from the band Heart, on critics of their music, that shit would be hysterical!)
Seriously though, I urge you to write, email, or phone your representatives and demand an end to Daylight Saving Time.
Make sure to point out that the daylight does not, in fact, need saving anyway.